I have had many periods in life where I feel like I am constantly not in the flow. Where my mind is and where my physical being is feels like poles apart. Going against the current is exhausting both mentally and physically. But we are taught to keep going and not to give up. Because God forbid we are failures! I am my one worst enemy and I constantly have stood in my own way. I push myself to make things work even if they aren’t and I have driven myself into stalemate.
Is it the need to control that keeps us bound to these patterns? Are we unable to ever move forward if we stay stuck in controlling all the pieces?
Interesting at this same week last year I was having a similar experience. The Art of War
The Art of Surrender
This past week I had the guidance to give up. Let go. Let myself flow downstream and stop trying to control all that surrounds me. I’ve been driving myself crazy doing too many things at one time. I overly think about everything that I want, need and desire. It is time to let go of the notion that I am not enough or that there is something in me that I need to fix. I must let go of thinking that there is some other place I should be and that where I am at is not enough.
I have exhausted myself again by fighting a silent fight of internal wills. My energy has felt frantic with no real direction. I have felt busy for the sake a looking busy. And I realized I need to love where I am at in my mind, body and soul. I am right on time for what I needed of me. And maybe all of these external needs that I think my spirit wants is only ran by my ego needed something it thinks is not there. I am not enjoying life the way life was intended. We don’t need wings to fly. We just need to let go.
The art of surrendering is finally realizing you cannot control it all. You cannot control your neighbor. You cannot control every circumstance. It goes against the universal laws. It goes against the flow. Sometimes going against flow is not always the answer. Sometimes you have to surrender in order to move forward. Maybe being the rebel is not always the answer. PEACE.